My Tree Frog

JUST when you think you have failed.

2011-01-20T23:38:00.000-07:00

I have really felt like a complete failure when it came to potty training. Seriously! It was causing me ridiculous stress. Mostly, out of expectation I was placing on my self and Renn. Months ago we had him trained on one of those plastic little potties (it was a frog) and he got it - no problem! But, the skill wasn't translating to the real looking potty at school. Our pediatrician urged me to toss the plastic potty and START OVER on our BIG people potty.
WOW! Was that painful. He cried over the froggie being gone, he cried over the BIG potty, he DIDN'T want to use it, try to use it, he wanted nothing to do with it. I tried everything. Cheerios in the potty, treats if he would just TRY and I sadly one day tried yelling (DOES NOT WORK - DO NOT TRY) It was a serious battle and I felt like I was losing. I internally battled with if we would even work on it over Christmas break because I didn't want the two of us miserable the whole time. So... I resolved to LET IT GO! He would get it, eventually. It would be okay if he was three and not potty trained. The world would NOT end over it. And darned if that didn't do the trick!!!! I truly don't know when or how but he got it. AT HOME! Moving that to school has been another story. First couple of days at school involved accidents. I had to hold my breath and stay strong. "This is normal, don't panic, he will get there!" Then we went into a week of no accidents BUT he also wasn't using the potty. HE WAS HOLDING IT!!! Basically, he would wait till nap when they use a pull up and then do his thing. UG! Stubborn little man. Then last week who knows what came over me but I said "Renn, if you use the potty at school today you will get a candy cane on the ride home." Sure enough bribery worked. The teachers said it took till 4:30 in the afternoon but he was determined to get that candy cane. I am excited to report that as of today he went THREE times at school! I am now greeted at pick him up with "Mommy, I went potty! I WANT my candy cane!"
What am I going to do when I run out of my Christmas stock pile of candy canes? You can mail any candy canes you have to me! I will pay...BIG money!
In all seriousness this has been one of my greatest feelings of failure as a mom. It was awful. Was I doing something wrong? Were we being inconsistent? Was something wrong with him? Is it because I am not a stay at home mom that could invest the time working with him? It was a ugly season of questioning, worrying, fearing. All over the skill of....using the potty? Seems ridiculous as I type it but I wanted to record it as I KNOW this was simple compared to the challenges that life can and will bring. I know in my heart I will need to be reminded that I need to resolve to LET IT GO! more often.

Happy 2011

2011-01-03T16:01:00.000-07:00

Renn rang in the new year in California! Visiting Grandpa Bill and Grandma Angie, Lady and Jack! AND he was actually awake when midnight rolled around. Wide awake! Watching Nick Jr. and playing a puzzle game on his passed down iphone. Crazy kid! He also got to feed ducks, play basketball, enjoy tormenting the dogs and best of all be a wild man with Grandpa Bill. Hello 2011!

Firsts!

2010-12-31T15:39:00.000-07:00

I am always amazed by how many "firsts" a child experiences and the wonder and awe on their face when it happens. Renn's 2010 firsts were:

1st trip to Disneyland

1st time spending the night with a friend when sissy was born.

1st sibiling

1st movie experience: Toy Story 3

1st ice cream cone

1st bath with a sibling

1st time going to a live show: Sesame Street Live

1st time playing with a caterpillar

1st time with headphones

1st time turning 2

1st time to the beach

1st time playing with trains

1st time in underwear

May life be filled with so many adventures that there continue to be many FIRSTS!

Embrace the Camera Favs

2010-12-28T20:29:00.001-07:00

Sometime in the Spring I discovered the Anderson Crew blog. She is a photographer that hosts a weekly "linky" party called Embrace the Camera. You are encouraged to be in front of your camera WITH your kids so that they actually have pictures of themselves WITH you. The goal is for it to not be perfect pictures but simply pictures that capture life. It has been a fun weekly challenge. Here are a few of my favs from the year.

Conversations with Renn.

2010-12-28T20:14:00.000-07:00

Most days I still find it odd that I can carry on a full fledge conversation with Renn. This helpless baby that just two years ago could only cry as a means of communicating now converses. I stand amazed. I wish I could just have a recorder on at all times to capture all his quirks. But, not possible. Instead a I recorded the things he said as a part of a 1/2 hour drive to the zoo.

I am starving!
There are LOTS of stores.
Stop
That's not good.
Ready?
What's daddy gonna pick?
Why?
What's that noise?
Where's daddy? I can't see him. He went in that door over there? That glass one? The glass one on that building? I am going to take my buckles off to go find daddy. There he is!
Thanks!
Now go!
I wanna go down. I really wanna go.
Hey look! Your football game.
I need a tissue mommy.
What do you have in your mouth daddy? Oh. Food? Oh food.
I wanna pick something out of my stocking.
Cars are under there. Cars are up there. Why?
Whoa. That's a huge tunnel.
What's up ahead?
Look daddy. Look up in the sky. There is a flying car in the air. Look up ahead there is a big tunnel. Look there are drums.
That is a really huge drum. Wow! Look at that? Oh. What's that?
Are we ready? Here we go. Whoa.
Sissy, what are you looking at? Sissy, what are you doing?
Look at those big tires, mommy.
Where is cita? I can't see her. Oh, there she is.
I wanna go to the zoo. Look a big building. Where's the zoo? Over there. Holy cow! Where are snakies?

Renn in December!

2010-12-28T17:02:00.003-07:00

According to Facebook

Renn asked me if I was a princess this morning. What prompted said question? I am wearing a skirt. Rare. J December 23

My two year old has called me Babe three times today. How do I explain that his daddy can call me that but it's not on the list for him? December 20

Renn HAD ;) to throw a party for his friends tonight. Pizza and brownie bar. He is napping and I am licking the bowl of the brownie batter. SCORE! LOVE the "excuse" of kids. December 17

Renn just lifted up his shirt and said "mommy, I don't see Jesus in my heart?” December 4

Renn is is telling me he NEEDS to go to the zoo because he needs to get all the animals out of their cages. L J December 3

I believe we just found Renn's Christmas present as he is sobbing on the floor of Target over a car ramp thing. NEVER done that so I am having a hard time not laughing. November 27

Renn's First Performance

2010-12-28T00:05:00.001-07:00

There are times that my heart aches that Renn is being taught by someone other than myself but most of the time I am very thankful for his preschool experience and the opportunities he has at his age. This year he got to perform in his first Christmas "show". It was a very exciting moment from a former stage girl turned mama. In my humble opinion there is a potential future for this man. But, what mama doesn't think that?

The year of the trains.

2010-12-25T23:27:00.016-07:00

Over my maternity leave with Avery we discovered the train set at Barnes and Noble. The prefect free entertainment for my little man. It was then that the plotting and planning began to get Renn his own trains and train table for Christmas. My parents agreed to tackle the train and track angle and Eric and I would tackle the table. Boxes began arriving at our house that I had to hide and Eric assembled the train table on Christmas Eve all for the big WIN on Christmas Day!
This was the first year I felt like he got the excitement around presents. Despite being up late he was up early and ready to go. Wanting to know what was in all the packages below the tree that had excited him for a month. He loved every minute of it!

Bed Time

2010-12-01T23:10:00.003-07:00

There has been a shift in Mr. Renn's bed time ritual. Before recently I would have defined it as easy. 7:30 p.m. would come and we would head to his bed, get in p.j.s, read a few books, tell a story, say our prayers, I would give him a kiss good night and he would head off to sleep. Easy!

Now around 7:30 p.m. we enter into negotiations. Renn usually wants to watch one more tv show, play trains just a little longer, needs something more to eat or simply decides to be defiant and pitch a mini fit. Since he seems to WANT to stay awake we have even gone so far as to let him stay up super, super, super late (on a non school night, of course) but he still doesn't want to head to bed. Wild!

Once we do make it into the bedroom he begins the haggling process for how many books are read. You feel guilty telling your kid that you will only read 3 books since we are now at an hour past bed time. Once the reading, story telling and prayers are complete Mr. Renn pours on the " I love you, Mommy!", "Don't leave me, Mommy!", "Let me give you kisses and hugs", "Stay with me, please". I am guilty of loving his sweet hugs and words of kindness that I stay. We fall asleep. I know it is a terrible, terrible habit but I also know I won't be able to have these moments for long. When he snuggles in and says "I love you!" I melt and all the antics he has pulled prior to bed are forgotten. Oh, bedtime!

Christmas Photo Shoot 2010

2010-11-26T17:11:00.001-07:00

Ahhhhh it is time for the yearly Christmas photo shoot. Which ALWAYS involves something not going as I planned. Year 1: Renn needed a nap. Year 2: Renn was teething and had a runny, runny nose. The fact that this year's shoot was going to involve an additional child I threw up my hands and just knew there was no way to control all the elements. So I put my thinking cap on. When are both my kids having the most fun together? Got it!!! When we are playing on the bed or all climbing over the couch cushions. Insert mattress, pillows, green green grass, the fabulous Carrie Fay and we have a low stress photo shoot peeps.

Renn Rides A Camel!

2010-11-01T00:04:00.001-07:00

Every couple of weeks Renn, Avery and I head to the zoo on Monday. Today Eric took a day off and joined us. Woo hoo! The boys rode a camel!

Go team Disney!

2010-10-31T23:35:00.006-07:00

Renn's Cita (my mama) found a 2T Mickey Mouse costume soon after he was born. Which means I feel like I have been waiting for this Halloween for years. Knowing he wasn't a big fan of costume wearing I convinced Daddy that we ALL needed to dress up. It was good ole family fun!

The RIGHT nows!

2010-10-21T08:42:00.011-07:00

A few things Mr. Renn loves RIGHT now.
Foods: taquitos and refried beans, Chick-fil-a nuggets and fries, juice, grilled cheese and soup, french toast and cereal bars
Singing: Theme songs, Raffi, & Chapel CD
Books: Swimmy, Polar Express, Little Engine that Could
Shows: Any and all Veggie Tales, Kai Lan, Upside Down Show & Blues Clues
Toys: Stuffed frog and bears, Thomas the trains, cars, blocks and puzzles.

But, MY favorite thing is to watch him be creative with his things. Such as finding things to drive his cars through like the rollers stored under my sink. Glad they have a purpose again.

A brother & his sister

2010-10-13T17:04:00.002-07:00

Renn loves, loves, loves his sissy! He wants to hug her, kiss her and share with her. But, he also wants to push her, kick her, take things from her, hide her things, and do things to be basic BIG brother irritants. I already see that he will protect her at all costs but I anticipate some healthy sibling antics going on between the two.

Renn Moves His B-Day

2010-09-17T00:04:00.005-07:00

The kid understands birthday and cake!
And he wants it all the time. Too bad he has 7 months to go.

sand

2010-08-31T22:25:00.000-07:00

in the face.

We are headed to Cali again soon and ALL I can think about is this....

he dove in face first and loved every minute of it!

With Joy, Carey

collage

2010-08-30T21:23:00.001-07:00

Renn's teachers gave me homework.
I was to make a collage of Renn's likes.
It was a fun little assignment.
The results:

I think I will do this assignment every three months

as a helpful record of the little man.

Memory Verse Time!

2010-08-25T16:19:00.000-07:00

Renn gets the opportunity to attend chapel every week. They have a monthly memory verse. This is his first one to learn and share with us. As a Christian Educator I am loving it!

success.

2010-08-09T07:51:00.002-07:00

I did NOT totally steal this idea from a
post on Buggie and Jellybean

Because of the inspiration we decided to get Renn a pen pal.

What a fun way to connect him

with the daughter of my BFF for 36 years,

Margaret McClain Raney.

They have exchanged their first "gifts" and it was a huge success.

art work by MMR

renn loves the sea shells

they sit on his bedside table

renn says thank you and good night to MMR.

you should watch, seriously.

the last couple of seconds are too precious.

It is our turn to get the next surprise in the mail.

a daddy caterpillar

2010-07-28T21:57:00.001-07:00

Bath Time Fun!

2010-07-19T22:06:00.001-07:00

I promise even when he looks so serious he is having fun! The organization and re-organization of his animals is a mission critical project.

Pen Pal

2010-07-17T17:19:00.000-07:00

Mr. Renn made a fabulous painting for his 1st letter to his pen pal: Miss Margaret McClain Raney.

Here the two are on their second meeting. They may be states apart but Elizabeth (my BFF of 36 years) and I are going to keep them connected. Such fun!

coloring in lines.

2010-06-28T12:41:00.000-07:00

We were coloring this morning when Renn decided to dump out the entire box of crayons.

No biggie!

I walked away for a moment only to come back to him not coloring the furniture but...

making lines with his colors. He is already much more organized than his mama.

To Infinity and Beyond

2010-06-21T15:45:00.000-07:00

Last night my mother-in-law convinced me to take the kids with them and all the cousins to Toy Story 3 today. It would be Renn's first movie going experience. After all the checking I could do on the fear factor level of it I decided we would give it a try and... it worked! I went armed with Chick-fil-a hidden in the diaper bag and cookies. He thought the chairs were a ride and only got stuck once, the sound scared him at first and the movie entertained him most of the time. I think my favorite part was how excited he got about every little thing and showed it (out loud kinda showed it). I felt sorry for the peeps in back of us, but luckily they had little ones too. Good memory maker!

Renn enjoying the seats. Renn with Addison. Avery went too.

Addison took good care of Renn. Molars coming in - thus the finger in his mouth ALL the time.

Feeding a Lion

2010-06-16T19:20:00.001-07:00

Today we fed a lion. A lion named Tex. Let me explain...noooo let me sum up (ahh...Princess Bride how I heart you).
Renn has a stuffed lion. A lion named Tex that goes just about everywhere with him right now. Tonight the lion came with us to the dinner table. When it was time to pray Renn took the lion's hands and crossed them and held them together. When we said "amen" Renn told us that the lion said "amen". Before each bite Renn took he offered the lion a bite. After he would take a sip from his straw he would then offer the lion a sip and leave the straw at the lions mouth for 3 seconds while the lion was "drinking". After he was done with dinner he let us know that the lion needed a "treat"! Good try kido, good try!
P.S. - Renn also cooked for us tonight. He made us "segetti". And even though it was imaginary it sure was tasty.
LOVING IT!

Sense of Humor

2010-06-15T21:18:00.000-07:00

I love Renn's laugh. I am used to him laughing a lot. But, I am used to him laughing at us or at least at us making him laugh. But, recently I have found he has developed a sense of humor. He can look at pictures and find it funny, hear something in a story and giggle or see something in a tv show that sends him into hysterics. How does this happen? Example: He was watching one of his favorite shows the Backyardigans. The characters started saying the word "pew-eew". A word I don't think he has even heard before. And when he hears it he simply begins cracking up...like rolling on the floor laughing. Yes, the word is funny but how does he know that? I am curious....very very curious to watch my little man's humor style develop. Let the laughter continue.

Growing Up

2010-06-11T19:57:00.001-07:00

I feel like life with Renn since he turned two has been a whirl wind of change, change and more change. Here are a few.
Sentences: I feel like I was just getting used to all the words he was saying when all of the sudden he moved onto sentences. Is he even legal? A few of my favorite's are:
It's coming.
It's a happy dog.
Build a word. (thank you Word World)
Daddy is home.
Mama is coming.
Love you, (insert name of choosing)
Let's close it. (said often...to me)
I am marching.
Awesome Daddy.
Mommy has pink flower.

Potty Training (kinda): Renn has been telling us for awhile when he "poots". With the new baby I wasn't up for tackling potty training till recently. He has a frog potty now and a kido seat for the big potty. We have had one successful attempt when he was in the bath tub and declared he had to "poot". There is no pressure what-so-ever. Just want to help him start associating how it all works.

Big Bed: I am convinced I know what it will feel like to send Renn off to college. The same as when he got his big boy bed (a big ole full size bed). He has been ready for awhile, but I wasn't ready. I couldn't let go of his baby days and him in his crib. But, alas it was time. Actually, Eric just said he was doing it and I better order the bedding I wanted (911 call to PBK was placed). In order to fit his full size bed in his room we had to remove his rocker and ottoman that I have used with his since he was a baby. Many a nights he was rocked to sleep as he was teething and many a mornings we sat together in this rocker drinking milk and singing songs. Just moving it brought me to tears. Eric set the bed up while I was at work. And the result was that Renn LOVES it. I am enjoying getting to lay together at night and read book after book after book. He looks so tiny in the bed and is still not used to sleeping with sheets, comforter and a pillow. When he wakes in the morning though he loves just hanging out in his bed.

Block Wars: Renn loves blocks and guess what? So does Eric! In fact we were having so many struggles with sharing our blocks properly that Eric had to go out and buy the extra extra big bag of blocks to add to our collection. You should see the creations they make. Castles, bridges, houses with windows, planes, cars, boat...their imagination is endless. It is fun to watch them play.

Some days the change is overwhelming. But, most days I just love being able to be in conversation with him, read with him, build and create with him. Two days ago one of his teachers gave me one of the greatest compliments I could EVER get. She was sitting with me and she said "Renn has one of the best imaginations." My heart just lept with joy!

UV expressed

2010-05-11T21:23:00.000-07:00

Tonight was a huge night for the tree frog and his parents. Since the moment I can remember we have told Renn that we love him prior to bed. As his vocabulary has grown we have been hoping/wanting "love" to become one of his words. But, to no avail. We would continue to say it each night (repeatedly) hoping for it to be reciprocated but it never came in words. The last few weeks he has become such a parrot of all we are saying we thought certainly he would say it but it did not come. Till TONIGHT! I was carrying Renn to bed and Eric was doing dishes. Eric said "love you, son" and out of no where Renn turns his head and says "uv you"! I screamed!!! DID YOU HEAR THAT? DID YOU HEAR THAT? Eric was giddy with laughter!
It was so real and heartfelt. It didn't feel like he was just repeating daddy but that he got it!
IT WAS AMAZING! AAAAmazing!
P.S. - I will admit there was a tinge of jealousy in me that wishes it was said to me but I will take it however it comes.
WE LOVE YOU TREE FROG!!!

Parrot

2010-05-09T12:05:00.003-07:00

We recently got a Parrot. It is male and 2 years of age. He is very colorful and energetic. Our parrot is also extremely quick to learn and literally repeats the last word(s) of everything you say. You have to be cautious with your words, music and TV around our parrot. Our parrot also helps us realize the words we use the most:
I don't know
yeah
I got it
yeah
okay
everywhere
yeah
it's coming
okay
what's that?
yeah
this way
okay
yeah
okay
yeah
okay
and yeah, yeah, yeah.
We are attempting to replace the yeah with "yes"
If you would are worried about being mimicking then beware of our parrot, his name is Renn.
P.S. Our parrot also loves the word ausaurs (dinosaurs)

Brought to you by the letter R!

2010-04-27T14:49:00.019-07:00

Renn turned 2! We are calling it the TERRIFIC TWO'S. Because he is terrific! Energetic, playful, talkative, independent, loving, caring, creative, organized and just plain wonderful. He brings us plenty of joy and teaches us new ways to be the best parents we can be. I became a bit obsessive over his birthday party despite a new baby in our lives. I wanted him to know how special he is to us and I wanted him to have a fun day all about him. I am thankful all the hard work paid off. He had a blast at his Sesame Street themed party!

We made our own version of the Sesame Street sign for the front yard welcome. We filled the back yard with bubbles, balls, sidewalk chalk, crawling tunnel, crayons and a canvas. I replaced the dining room drapes with paper chain "drapes" in primary colors. We also turned an empty

room in our house into a mini theater with red curtains and a large TV showing Elmo. I actually wasn't expecting this room to be used as much as it was.

The lunch table had white paper bags that kids could decorate and then pack their own lunch of chicken nuggets, applesauce, raisins, carrots and their choice of chocolate milk or juice. The desert table featured cupcakes with toppers I made to match the invitations. We also had chocolate chip cookies made by Grandma. We figured if Cookie Monster showed up we should have his favorite food. There was also Blue Bell ice cream served. When you come from Texas that is a MUST!

These are just a few pictures that capture the day more can be found in The Gallery section. We are so thankful for all the help we had and our event photographer Ginger Morby.

Getting Adventurous

2010-04-13T12:23:00.001-07:00

3 weeks ago I would have told you that Renn was never going eat anything more than chicken nuggets and applesauce probably for his whole life. Being a picky eater myself I really had no issue with him being picky and was happy to make him his own meal each night. But, a few weeks ago we learned he eats - eats things besides nuggets and applesauce. I had made Eric and myself a Mexican fiesta for dinner and Renn his usual affair. As we ate Renn clearly asked for beans. I thought, “yeah, right – he doesn’t really want beans” But sure enough he did. FIVE large spoonfuls later he was content and very uninterested in his nuggets. Now he is consistently eating what we eat with the addition of applesauce. Somethings are tough to give up – or maybe it is just me not willing to let him give it up.

It's Official!

2010-03-01T13:20:00.004-07:00

On February 16th at 10:02 a.m. Renn Jackson Bailey became a big brother. His sister is Miss Avery Elizabeth Bailey. Due to swine flu children are not permitted into hospitals which meant Renn was unable to meet his sissy untill we came home from the hospital on the 19th. And thankfully the reaction is LOVE! Renn loves his sissy, The "B" or vry vry. He is very concerned for her at all times, wants to peak on her in the crib, "ug" (hug) her, touch her hair, ears, nose and mouth. We are having to work with him a bit on being gentle and he tends to want on the lap of the person holding her but all in all it is best reaction to a new sibling I could have hoped for. We are praying constantly that they are a loving and caring brother and sister pair forever.

It is also official that we have begun using "time-outs" with Mr. Renn. I will never know if it is simply the age (22 months) or a sister coming along that caused a few new behaviors (throwing toys, choosing not to mind, some face whacking). I am having to find a "mom" voice that he actually responds to. I always thought I had one but right now it is only evoking laughter from him. He sits well in time-out and I wish he wasn't so cute when I get him. He sits there all smiles and when I approach he looks up and says "all done" in his sweet little voice. Not sure it is all computing but it makes me feels like I am taking the right step???? Eric is having to work really hard at finding the "dad" voice in him. Right now he simply has to turn his face to hide the laughter. And then I have to work really hard at not joining him. Last night we had a huge FAIL! Renn plopped both feet on the kitchen table after he was done eating. Eric tried telling him "no" and then just busted out laughing, I couldn't help but laugh and soon Renn joined us. We were all giggling.

The whole thing is truly helping me examine what is a "no!" in life. Want to make sure the little guy hears the word yes! in life more than he hears no! Parenting is always teaching me something.

Explosion

2010-02-14T20:59:00.004-07:00

We are in the midst of a word explosion right now. I won’t even do the list justice, but I wanted to try and capture the words Renn is saying. I am just amazed - everyday it seems to be something new!

Family: Mama, Dada, Enn (Renn), Papa, Addison
School friends: Sue, Occo (Rocco), Nendall (Kendall), Michael
Animals: Dawg, Orsey(Horse), Moo, Eow (Meow), Owl, Iggy (Pig), Goat, Fox, ChIcken, Bird, Uck, Frog, Roar, Phent (Elephant), Ba (Sheep), Bear, Butterfly, Ish (Fish)
Foods: Milk, Wawa, Juice, Cereal, Chicken, Banana, Apple, Egg, Pickle, Cake, Cookie
Shapes and Colors: Circle, Star, Yellow, Green
Body Part: Eyes, Nose, Ead(Head), Mouth, Ears
Things in motion: Motocyle, Us (Bus), Car, Oat(Boat), Tuck (Truck), Choo Choo (Train)
Numbers: He can repeat 1-10 in English and Spanish
Misc: Up, This way, That way, Thank you, Welcome, Bye, Night-Night, Out, Elmo, Medicine, Book, Bonk, Misus (Music), Pease (Please), On, Off, Open, Close, Ickky (Mickey), Ubbles (Bubbles), Ottball (Football), Shoe, Ants(Pants), Socks, Ucket (Bucket), Trash, Mess, Elp(Help), Ug (Hug), No, Bath, Side(Outside), Bag, Clothes, Ooon (Moon), Tickle, Nice, Ouse (House), Barn

Precious Moments

2010-01-10T23:01:00.007-07:00

If you read this blog then you have probably figured out my bad habit. I avoid updating the blog because I am attempting to avoid dealing with the feelings at hand. Well, here we are… it is time to stop avoiding and start dealing. We are six weeks from baby girl Bailey’s arrival (saying our prayers and crossing our fingers for the full 6 weeks) and we are of course thrilled, nervous, anxious, excited and many more adjectives but at the same time I have been working so hard to hold tight to all the precious precious moments between the tree frog and me. To watch him grow over the last few months has been incredible. Discovering his independence, learning word after word after word, learning to count in English and Spanish, his continued love of the outdoors, music and dancing (the boy has moves). But, the moments I am cherishing the most right now are his new found love of snuggling and cuddling. He now gives kisses on his own (open mouth), he asks for “ugs” (hugs) and simply enjoys snuggling in my arms as we watch Sesame Street or Word World. These moments are indescribable! All I know is that I never want them to stop, that I want him to need his “mama” forever and that I already bawl like a baby when I think of him being a teenager.

I am certain all these emotions are heightened due to the fact that no matter what I do right now change is on the way with another babies arrival imminent. The truth is I am so worried! Will Renn still feel how much I love him, will I have enough attention to provide him and will there still be cuddle opportunities? EVERYONE tells me it works out! And at this point all I can do is trust - trust that there is enough love in my heart to go around, enough attention to be shared and enough energy to make each day happen. I am all thankful for all the examples of mothering multiples I have in my life – it allows me to have a sense of faith in the adventure that lies ahead.

Goodness, a year and half ago I never would have imagined all that would have been brought into my life by bringing the little tree frog into world and I am certain God has plenty more in store for us for as family. I will continue to hold tight to the precious memories being created in these days for our family of three and I look forward to the memories that are to come once we are four.

Grieving

2009-10-12T04:18:00.007-07:00

It is 2:30 a.m. on moving day and I am up. Up and frustrated that there is much more to do, but I can't be packing while the boys are sleeping. While I am thrilled to be moving into a one story house with a much better floor plan for two kidos I am also grieving leaving this house. There are so many memories here and while my head knows they will still exist the thought of leaving this house makes me tear up.

I will always remember that Eric got the keys to this house the day before our first date and I was impressed that he even kept the date. Eric and I watching Narnia on the floor because he had no furniture, picking out paint colors, being on my best detailed behavior as I helped paint; my way of impressing him. Seeing the sky of the backyard filled with hot air balloons and knowing I was "home", coming home from our wedding to a broken heater in January (even though it is Phoenix it still gets cold), how we watch movies and how we each have "our" spot on the couch, Eric cooking dinner for me on our first married Valentines, Eric's bird watching obsession and then there was the grandpa scorpion. Telling Eric I was prego, bringing Renn "home", the rattlesnake found in the backyard when Renn was just a few weeks old, the neighborhood walks, the beautiful sunrises, Renn crawling, pulling up, walking, the way he loves the stairs and how he always shuts the baby gates. Playing hide and go seek in the closet, creating Renn's playroom out of the office, Renn's first birthday party, bike rides, watching Renn learn to open doors and how he always want to visit people in the bathroom. Telling Eric I was prego again! and the realization this sweet sweet house just wasn't going to cut it.

It has been a great first house for us and I will miss it and the incredible dessert view. It provided shelter, comfort, peace, many a great meals and a beautiful place for us to grow as a family. Thank you house - we pray you are blessing to others.

Like Father, Like Son

2009-09-08T13:57:00.007-07:00

Believe me I really do think about blogging everyday. The thoughts are there. I truly just get overwhelmed with Renn's development and changes that I can't process them fast enough. With Baby Bailey II on the way I have been reflecting so much on where we have been to where we are now that it is hard to believe that this 16 month old toddler was once completely helpless.

I still sit in awe that he now reasons and rationalizes. That he uses and understands words like baoon (balloon and ball), dawg (dog), uck (duck), ut-oh (also includes a backwards wave), wht's at? (what's that?), lmo (Elmo) and then there is the one we are working on which is sheep...it always comes out sounding like s@i#. Trying to perfect this one a little better. He has attachment to things. His sheep puppet (thus the need to work on how he asks for it), Elmo doll, stacking toy, multiple books that we must read multiple times in a row and balloons. You can now see him have a range of emotions; frustration (comes with a whine), sadness (comes with a pouty face), happy (the most common), glad (usually when mama or daddy enters the room) and my personal favorite is excited (comes with yeah! and clapping or sometimes you get a ta-da!)

The funniest thing to discover about Renn is that he has so many likeness to his daddy. We begin the list!

1. They both love to car dance. Since I have met Eric he is what a I call an excellent car dancer. The boy has seated moves and they have rubbed off. The two of them can sit in the driveway one in the passenger seat one in the drivers seat grooving to some tunes. Heads moving in sync.

2. Ear scratch. Eric has a unique way he scratches his ear. He flips one finger backwards and then in a very fast motion swipes the inside of his ear. We have noticed that Renn does it the exact same way - finger flip and all.

3. Organizationally obsessed. My hubby loves the tupperware organized just so and the pantry just right and the fridge has to have things perfecto. And thank God he does it! But, now I have a mini him. Renn has taken to the side door. Every time the fridge is open he heads over to remove all that he can from the side door and then quickly rearrange it as needed. I honestly wonder how much of our power bill goes to fridge organization.

4. Laundry guru's. My sweet hubby does the laundry due to the fact that I work the weekends and this is generally when he needs his laundry done. Renn is now an excellent assistant. Handing daddy clothes, putting clothes in the hamper, helping with the folding. Renn also decides what is important to have upstairs and what needs to come down. His favorite thing to do once things come out of the dryer is throw it over the stair banister. Besides laundry Renn also sweeps, puts dishes in the dishwasher, takes them out and the latest is you can ask him to throw something away and he takes it to the trash can, lifts the lid and adds the item to the garbage. So excellent!

5. The Bailey walk. If you know Eric then you know that he has a distinctive walk. Eric's dad also has the same walk. Honestly, the family kinda giggles about it. I wish I could figure out a clever way to describe it. It is head held high short man's kinda strut...that is the best I got. Well, I am going on the record right now as saying that Renn has the walk. Eric doesn't see it, but I promise it is there. Bailey walker III on the way!

With all this development going on it is hard not to love it all. But, the thing I LOVE LOVE the most is that I can now say "Renn, give mama a kiss." and he walks over, grabs my face and plants one on me. AHHHHHH....love! Love you Tree Frog!

The Greatest Disappointment

2009-06-19T13:09:00.009-07:00

The greatest disappointment in becoming a parent is that I now don't possess some mad Harry Potter skill to stop time. There are multiple moments in a day that I just want everything to freeze so that life can just continue on exactly as is or so that I can run and grab the camera. A few such moments not to be forgotten.

. Getting your first Happy Meal on your 1st Birthday

. "Losing" your stroller on your 1st birthday in Anthem Park

. Watching you have your first bite of cake and ice cream

. Having you reach for and hold my hand

. Our walk and talk from the car to your classroom

. How much you love outside. Please love outside forever.

. Your first time in a baby pool

. Discovering magnets

. Discovering magnets stick to the walls

. Crawling DOWN the stairs for the first time

. Your mad dancing skills

. Your woody woodpecker laugh

. "That?"

. How you enjoy playing with other kids. Thank you preschool.

. Watching you learn to problem solve

. Your love of music

. My excitement when you put banana chunks in your mouth. You would have thought he had just been accepted to Julliard.

. Your smile when we clap for you

. We think your love language is touch or pinching

. Watching you experience dogs for the first time

We enjoy you always little tree frog!

B A L A N C E

2009-05-18T21:00:00.009-07:00

Upon learning I was going to become a mama I was filled with joy but, there were also multiple fears that came to my mind. One of the greatest being could I give "me" up? Despite the fact that I had looked forward to being a mommy since I was young I was truly concerned that I couldn't be the selfless woman I needed to be.

The truth is that I loved my pre-motherhood life. I loved using my day off for journaling, seeing an artsy flick by myself, cleaning out random drawers or just adventuring. I loved spending my birthday in my p.j.'s, eating a pint of Hagan-Daz and watching 5 hours of self-indulgent soap operas. I loved sushi night with the girls, date night with the man and getting to read whenever I wanted. I honestly didn't know how I would feel about my life, as I knew it, drastically changing.

I was surprised how easy it was to make the sacrifice! The day Renn Jackson Bailey entered the world it was an automatic instinct in me that it was ALL ABOUT HIM! Whatever he wanted or needed was my priority. Sleeping, eating and gifts meant nothing to me anymore. I only wanted things to be for and about Renn.

Therefore it was a shock that the week of his 1st birthday I began hearing a voice. A voice that began to whisper to me "What about me?". I tried ignoring it. Then the "What about ME?" voice started getting louder. I actually tried to get angry with it...saying "GO AWAY! You don't belong here anymore!" The voice continued wearing me down...it became steady...like a chat: What about ME?, WHAT about me?, What ABOUT me?" And eventually I found myself agreeing with the voice and wondering myself "WHAT ABOUT ME?" As I let the selfish thoughts of days past brew inside of me one of my favorite words came to mind: BALANCE.

I have been in awe of how much parenthood is a reflection of how God's loves us. So as this "voice" took up residence in my head I had to take a look at how God lived while he was on earth. And while Jesus was 100% selfless I was reminded of how often and valuable "time-outs" were to him. Quiet time, reflection time, party time, friend time and family time were all valued.

I realize now that God has no intertest in me loosing myself and identity in motherhood. Besides balance being good for my well being I believe the example of this will be a good witness to my son. Therefore as I enter year two of my life as mama to the Tree Frog I look forward to creating more balance.

I have started by promising myself a manicure once a month. I have to start somewhere, right?

TOADily awesome 1st Birthday Party Log

2009-04-23T21:35:00.006-07:00

From a few days after your birth you were given the name "tree frog" so it was only fitting that your 1st birthday party have a frog theme.

Your Invitation: TOADily awesome birthday party! Bright paper, home computer, glue sticks and some googly eyes.

Inside Decor: We filled the living room with frog beach balls from Oriental Trading. Covered the dining room table with green polkadot paper, markers, crayons and some homemade frog coloring sheets

Food and Plating: We did green apples, green grapes & chick-fil-a nuggets. Tried to find green ketchup, but no luck.

The Cake: Cupcakes with frog toppers made by: Clineffs Confections and a cake for you. Bib was a towel found for $2.00 that I turned into a bib.

Outside: Ball pit, bubbles, Fly Bop (Bubbles on clearance for .17 cents and bright green dusters found at the dollar store), frog water squirters (Oriental Trading) and a frog toss (frog bean bags and beach buckets), there was also a bouncy in the driveway for older kids.

Party Favors: Frog puppets I made from felt I just happen to have and for the older kids candy bags. Tags were made on my home computer and printer. Frog basket made by: ladesigns2

Dear Stories of a Tree Frog Blog:

2009-03-24T06:37:00.017-07:00

I apologize for my absence, I have truly missed you and I think of you often. But, I have simply been too busy experiencing Renn to make time to write about him (oh yea, and I may have gotten distracted by joining Facebook and learning imovie). Since Renn began crawling I feel like this whole new world opened up - he became such a BIG boy. There are too many things I simply don't want to forget about this time:

Rolling Daddy across the floor

Pushing me from behind like I am a walker

Laying his head on our shoulder when we hug

Putting his hands over his mouth when I offer him meat

Spitting out the milk that comes in a sippy cup

Trying to decide if he likes grass or not

Crawling down the step from the house to the garage

His first steps (we are up to 8 in a row as of today)

Learning to feed himself Cherrios

His baby dedication, special! and the diaper incident that came with it.

How he loves to say Da or Da Da

His laugh

His smile

His crocodile tears

The way his clicks his tongue after we blow him kisses

How much he loves balls and music

The way he builds towers with socks and wipe boxes (why do we even bother with toys?)

The way he shakes his little body when music comes on

The way he heads straight to the fridge when it opens. (Does this mean he will eat me out of house and home one day?)

What an incredible sharer he is. (He did not get this from his mama!)

The amount of inspiration he causes me

The continual realization of HOW MUCH I love this child and would do anything for him.

Looking forward to your 1st birthday Tree Frog!

Renn on the Move!

2009-01-26T10:19:00.006-07:00

This was shot last night with my tiny Olympus - thus the poor quality - but I wanted all the grandparents to see him crawling. It began January 11th and he hasn't stopped! Toys interest him no longer. He only desires to get to a destination in which he can stand. Fun stuff! Getting plug covers today.

P.S. - I have no idea how to really edit the music and all that stuff on the video program. I will teach myself one day.

Christmas with the littlest Bailey

2009-01-05T10:52:00.009-07:00

What a joy the last two weeks have been. Eric and I have been off together. I can't tell you how nice it was/is to make things happen as a team.

Christmas Eve was wonderful. We had an amazing service at church. I felt a bit guilty sitting with Eric and Renn during the second service since it was over capacity...but it is a memory I will cherish. Despite Renn only having a 25 minute nap that day he did amazing. We headed to Grandma and Grandpa Graca's after for THE BEST lasagna in the ENTIRE world. We opened a hand full of gifts and headed home for some zzzzzz's.

Renn woke up around 7ish on Christmas Day. I had wrapped all his presents in one big box. So we let him just sit with the box for awhile and play with the paper. Finally, I couldn't stand it any longer and took to tearing at it so that we could get to the good stuff. I think I expected more excitement from him than I got. I now realize the poor child was on overload. We eventually put a few things away and only take out one or two at a time. I now get to see the smiles and glee as the toys come out and he gets to play. We hosted breakfast (my all time favorite meal) around mid morning. Renn got more toys from family! The kid scored! We just hung out the rest of the day - playing - eating - napping. It was just great!

Christmas and our anniversary go hand in hand.... So the evening of the 29th the Graca Gang came over while Eric and I had a lovely dinner at Lon's. This was where we had our luncheon following the wedding. Most of the time it is hard for me to believe we are only celebrating our second anniversary. In a good way it feels like we have been together for a lifetime. It was a nice evening filled with great memories!

We headed to Flagstaff on New Year's Eve and let Renn touch the snow. He wasn't overly impressed. And let's be honest - it was really just an opportunity for a photo shoot so that we could show him when he is older that he "played" in the snow.

The rest of the days were filled with catching up on movies, hanging/eating with friends and simpling tackling a few "to-do's" around the house.

We don't know if it is simply because we have been with him 24/7 the last two weeks, but he seems to have changed tremendously in front of our eyes. He can now take himself from his tummy to a full seated position. He is constantly rocking on his knees...learning how to make those crawling motions. You can leave him in one spot and come back to find him half way across the room. Here come the plug covers! It is truly amazing. I wonder if we still change that much everyday and just don't realize it?

As we read the Christmas story to him on Christmas morning - it hit me in a all new way. I guess realizing the amount of work Mary and Joseph had in front of them. Even with the mega amount of support I have, lets face it, raising a baby has a few challenges along the way - I can't even imagine how it challenged Mary. All the things Jesus was going to go through and learn prior to starting his public ministry. Just thinking about how much he spent those first years needing to depend on others to care for him is kinda odd. I mean it's Jesus! It just made me all the more thankful knowing how much He truly "gets" us and our daily walk on earth. What an awesome miracle.

The real answer...

2008-12-05T14:58:00.003-07:00

When I was single people would ask "Do you want kids?". I always thought it was their polite way of asking if I wanted to be married AND reminding me that I wasn't getting any younger. After I got married the question became "When are you going to have kids?" Now, after Renn has arrived the question has become "Are you going to have another baby?" Because I feel that I have to answer the question (and for some reason not truthfully) I have developed many answers.

Answer 1: I was so miserable during pregnancy I just don't think I could go through that again.

Answer 2: I really can't imagine recovering from another c-section. I wouldn't wish that on anyone! Even my childhood nemesis Francesca Shepherd...

Answer 3: I am too old!

Answer 4: Maybe we will adopt one day...

But, the real answer is that I simply don't want to think about another baby because I just want to enjoy the baby I have now! I want to enjoy Renn as he is right now, tomorrow and the next day to the very fullest without wondering what else might be ahead. I hope there is nothing wrong in that? If a sibling comes for Renn I am certain it would be amazing, but the truth is I am perfectly content with our little tree frog...he is a daily reminder of God's unconditional love for you and me.

NO PLANS FOR YOU!

2008-11-23T07:11:00.001-07:00

I am going to blog about this so you will ALL hold me accountable.

We have had our Christmas card photo shoot with CFA Photography on the books since summer. As you know from the previous blog I have been stressing about what we would wear, but along with that I have also been calculating how to make sure Renn was in the best of moods during the photo shoot. I knew it would be in the morning (during his normal 1st nap) for ideal lighting. Therefore we have spent days "rehearsing" sleeping later. I was waking him (I know, a huge no! no!) around 5am to feed him and then putting him back down. It was working great! He was waking right on cue and was in a perfectly pleasant mood from waking till the time the photo shoot was scheduled to end. WOO HOO!

THE PLAN was working!

Friday evening comes and everything was set...we had rehearsed...he was well feed...pajamas were just right... and then POOF! THE PLAN disappears!

Instead Mr. Renn decided to wake at 3am - the second I heard him on the monitor I knew we were in trouble. Carey's brain: "it's too early!...you can't wake up!...THE PLAN won't work!" I arise to feed my child and am trying to formulate "plan b". I decide to keep him and me up for awhile...we play...talk...sing. I am thinking if I keep him awake maybe he will sleep in.

NOPE! 7am I hear him chatting! Carey's brain: " Oh no! This will be a disaster! The pictures will be terrible. He will be tired, grumpy, eyes red. What are we going to do?" Time for "plan c" to go into action. Eric is to get dressed as fast as possible and then drive him around. He ALWAYS sleeps in the car! Carrie Fay is going to call when she is ten minutes away from the house and Eric and Renn will arrive back as well. All will be salvaged.

Eric, Renn and Carrie Fay all arrive and Eric announces " he DIDN'T sleep" Carey's brain: " Are you kidding me? He always sleeps, it never fails! I am out of plans...what are we to do? It is all ruined - the show must go on - sleep or no sleep"

The fact is we survived the photo shoot with NO plan. BIG thank you to my parents who jumped up and down and made him laugh with glee. And I here and now resign to NEVER attempting to make a PLAN again!

You can see a preview of our photo shoot here. More pictures to come! Thank you Carrie Fay, you are amazing!

Moments not to be forgotten...

2008-11-21T12:03:00.001-07:00

As we approach month seven I am going to steal a page from my friend Carrie Fay's blog and write about a few things he/we are doing that I simply don't want to forget...

1. Sleeping with his butt in the air with froggie nestled close by.

2. Grabbing his feet to lift his butt in the air when we want to put a new diaper on.

3. Waking up at 3:45 a.m. simply to chat with me. And me praying all the while that sixteen years from now he will still WANT to chat with his mama.

4. Standing in the kitchen cooking dinner listening to Eric make him crack up.

5. Eric sings a song and then Renn sings. Respectfully not interrupting his daddy.

6. How I open MY mouth as he opens his mouth waiting for a spoonful of food.

7. How he props his right foot up on his high chair tray while he eats. I keep trying to teach him this isn't polite, but to no avail.

8. How I have wasted countless hours figuring out what we will all wear for our first family Christmas card pictures. Truth is he would be precious in a diaper.

9. The fact that there are no words to describe how much I cherish the times he falls asleep in my arms.

10. That we can still sing Jesus Loves Me and it calms him down in an instant. We discovered this on about day six of his life and I am thankful it still works.

it's coming...

2008-11-02T16:09:00.000-07:00

A TOOTH, A TOOTH, A TOOTH is coming! I put my finger in his mouth last night and to my surprise I was bit by the beginnings of a tooth. The second one is coming quickly behind it. It is an exciting and sad moment all at the same time!

it is not a myth

2008-10-27T09:04:00.000-07:00

You always hear people with kids say how fast it all goes. And I will admit I didn't understand what it meant. It is time and it ticks by the same way it did before we had Renn. But, as we reached the 6 month milestone last week I can officially say "they" are right...it goes so fast.

In six months he has grown so much. He has gone from being a little six pound tree frog to being a sixteen pound tree frog. (Odd how I would not be bragging on myself if I had gained TEN POUNDS in six months.) Six months ago he would just sleep and eat - now he sleeps through the night, eats in record speed, eats from a spoon, rolls over, turns in circles on his belly, stands, tries to sit up, smiles, laughs, jumps, sucks his thumb, loves music, reading, the outdoors, has clear likes and dislikes and responds when other people enter or leave the room. It has been an amazing process to watch.

I did a decent job of keeping a journal while I was pregnant and it has been fun to look back on it and see what was happening this time last year. We had seen him once, heard his heart beat and were anxiously awaiting November 5th when we would find out he was a him. (although my heart knew it was a boy).

The past six months has been filled with so much newness that I can't imagine what the next six months or sixteen years will bring, but we look forward to the adventure.

The tree frog found his toes!

2008-10-10T13:51:00.001-07:00

I am not sure why I have been so anxiously awaiting this day, but I have been. I wanted him to find his toes. And on Monday, October 6th as I was talking on the phone to my mama he found his toes. I just love it!

Another significant first was that on October the 4th he rolled over from tummy to back. I didn't actually witness him doing this until the 6th but, it sure was funny to put him down on his tummy and turn around and find him on his back. It was like magic.

Renn and Eric got me a very cool bicycle for my birthday - I love it! And they both wrote (wink wink) me very sweet cards!

We headed to Pinetop for the weekend and Renn got to see ducks, rain, experience cold weather and play with his cousins. You can see all the pictures on the flickr site.

He continues to surprise us each day! He gets more and more animated...laughing, playing, trying to sit up and stand. He has now tried all the veggies and will be moving onto fruit this week. As you can tell from the picture - I let him "get messy"!

I have a few profound blogs in me about our little guy, just need to make the time to get the words formulated. Just wanted to get these updates logged before they become old news!

Where to begin?

2008-09-18T06:22:00.001-07:00

Sorry, to have taken a month off. Let me catch up!
August 22: First fever and cold. The fever lasted through the weekend. We are still dealing with the cough and congestion. He went on anti-biotics for it on September 16th.

August 26th: Four month check-up
Height: 25 1/14 inches - he grew long!
Weight: 13lbs 12oz - still a little guy!
Head: 17"

I am not really sure where the time goes, but it has been non-stop. His cough takes a lot out of him so he just isn't quite himself.

August 31st: Rice cereal for the first time. You can check out pictures on flickr.

September 15th: Tried peas. He likes them.

September 16th: First Open House. See other post.

September 18th: Gets pink eye! Begins eye drops! UG!

He is still a fabulous little sleeper. His cough is waking him once or twice in the night, but I just have to give him his pacifier and he heads back to dream town. He babbles quite a bit. More to his daddy than anyone else. He is working on rolling over and gets much more pleasure out of tummy time. He has even made himself scoot a bit on his knees. His new favorite toy is the rain forrest bouncer. And he loves to stand.

Really, all the specifics aside all I can say it that we love him soooooooooooo much. Goodness, he is just our joy and we are so thankful each and every day for our little guy.

First Open House

2008-09-16T06:22:00.000-07:00

On Tuesday, September 16th we attended our first Open House. The teachers had prepared an activity for the kids - which was so sweet. But, as you will see from the video Renn wasn't too impressed. Perhaps he won't have his mama's love of carbs?

Actually, the boy babe was just hungry and not in the mood. So we will try it at home soon.

P.S. - Why is it that adults talk "baby-talk" do we really think they understand us better? Just listening to us talk to him in the video is funny! This video was just shot with my little digital so it's not great, but it's something.

P.S.S. - It is his teacher not me thrusting the noddles in his face... a couple of you have asked :). I am working the camera... and yes, I know I need to go to video school.

mornin'

2008-08-18T09:06:00.001-07:00

mornin'
Originally uploaded by Carey Bailey

It was a BIG day yesterday.
Renn Jackson went from size 1 diapers to size 2. And even though size 2's are made to fit 12-18 pounds they look huge on him. We estimate he weighs 15 pounds right now, but will find out for sure next Tuesday as he goes for his 4 month check up.
Last night he also slept in real P.J.'s for the first time. He has been sleeping in a sleep sack and swaddle. We found he liked to sleep with his legs close to his body but recently he has been wriggling out of the swaddle part so we thought we would try P.J.'s and it worked no problem... he was still a great sleeper.! 9 hours! Can't complain.

Searching for the sunny side of things....

2008-08-11T13:02:00.000-07:00

I have simply been avoiding blogger because I know the post I am about to do will sound pathetic. I am very aware that there are people suffering all over the world and that what I am about to blog about can't even compare to the trials some people face day in and day out. But, I am hoping that by finally blogging about this I can move past it and get back to blogging about the fun stuff.
I returned to work three weeks ago. I knew it would be every adjective of tough to leave Renn in preschool and to not be responsible for his daily care at all times, but I never imagined it would be physically and mentally painful. It causes such heartache to leave him day in and out. It is painful to watch him cry, painful to see him simply be moved from swing, to bouncy, to crib, to floor all for the sake of appeasing him. I am there to feed him and I see the ladies working so hard to feed, change and care for the babies in the room so its not that I think anyone is being a slacker it's just that I know when we are at home it is so much more. We laugh, play, look at new things, sing, practice new skills and simply engage in the act of connecting.
I know I honestly can't go on like this. So Eric and I are looking at options... I even went so far as to see how you go about getting a job delivering papers. (Hey, I figure it would be something I could do before he wakes up :) ) Who knows what will transpire, but there has to be another solution. I told my mom the other day I wished I had started a savings account as a kid that could have been used to be a "stay at home mom". But, I just never imagined.
I truly do know that I have the best set-up possible. But, it is just not enough. I wish I could list off a bunch of positives right now, but I can't. All I know is I want to be the one caring for my little tree frog.

Our frog on a plane

2008-07-21T10:29:00.000-07:00

We did it! Our first plane ride back "home" to Texas. Eric would say Renn did much better than Mama. Honestly, I don't have one thing to whine about - he was perfect. Not one peep out of him the whole time. He ate when was supposed to - he sucked a pacifier when he was supposed to - he slept most of the journey. The only thing he didn't do when he was "supposed" to was poop. On both routes he pooped either on the plane or before we were to board and pooped through his outfits and had to get a change. Fun stuff!

My only advice to mommy's traveling is to back two diaper bags. Don't try to cram everything in one. It becomes too hard to find stuff in it on the plane. Pack two with some room to spare in each. Thanks for all the great advice provided by my mom friends. It all came in handy.

We had a great journey!

Grab Hold!

2008-07-15T10:46:00.000-07:00

This weekend Renn got a new and improved play mat. It is bigger and has many more "toys" to look at. We have also begun setting plastic rings by him for his fingers to play with. Today he grabbed hold..all on his own. I didn't put the rings in his hand - he just grabbed them and began whirling them around as his arms move non-stop. As I watch him I see him learning new things EVERY day... it is amazing!
It has made me think does learning something new daily stop or do I not pay enough attention to my life? I believe I am guilty of not paying enough attention. As I watch Renn constantly God is watching us... watching, waiting, desiring for us to grab hold of what He has put right in front of us.

He did it!

2008-07-09T12:59:00.000-07:00

This afternoon he was playing on his play mat (ugly as it is). My mama had rearranged all the critters on it to be in new and interesting places and he was just content playing away. I should have started putting him down for his nap at 12:30 p.m. but he was playing so well that I didn't see the need to rush it. Then low and behold I look over and his eyes were starting to get heavy and then he did it. On his eleven week old birthday he put himself to sleep!
I was shocked! He has never done that. Usually he has to be in the sling or be rocked to sleep.
Woo hoo! Makes me feel a bit better about him heading off to preschool in a few weeks.
Good job baby Renn!

Never Again!

2008-07-03T09:56:00.000-07:00

My phone alarm is set for 3 a.m. Renn usually wakes up a tad before it or right at it. But, last night was different. My phone alarm went off and IT woke me up - not any sounds from the baby monitor. I walked towards Renn's room and heard no cry or stir. I went around and peaked in his crib through the bathroom door - there was some movement but, nothing that would denote he was awake. So I headed back to bed thinking he will wake any minute now. The minutes kept ticking by and he wasn't waking. I am thinking quick "GO BACK TO SLEEP!" But, at the same time I was so excited he was reaching this milestone I couldn't sleep. Eric's, alarm sounds at 4:05 a.m. and I am realizing there is no returning to sleep land at this point. 4:39 a.m. comes and I have to get out of bed to pump - I would be sleeping in milk if I didn't.
On my way down the stairs I do the wrong thing and that is go take a "peek" at my little tree frog. My presence wakes him - I probably could have gotten him back to sleep - but I was missing my little guy so I pick him up to eat and we begin the day. ONE HOUR AND THIRTY NINE MINUTES LATER THAN USUAL!!! (not that it equalled any extra sleep, but still)
Two things I will never do again: Set my alarm and "peek" in his room!

Road trippin

2008-06-30T16:14:00.000-07:00

Here are a few lessons I learned from our road trip to California

Driving at night was good for baby rough on Daddy:
We chose to drive at night so that Renn would stay on schedule and could sleep the whole trip and that worked great! But, for Eric it was a bit rough. By the time we got there Wednesday night he had been up 18 hours straight. And in theory I should have been sleeping because Renn was sleeping but I felt bad sleeping while Eric was up so I did my best to stay awake as much as possible. The great thing is Renn slept fabulous while we were there. Hotel living really worked for him.

Everyone has an opinion:
I was amazed at how many people had commentary on our baby.
“His hair is long – he needs a hair cut. Are you going to get him a hair cut?” ANSWER: NO!
“He is fat – see those rolls there?” ANSWER: Our little 10 pounder is not fat and still fits in his premie clothes.
“Where are his socks ? – he needs socks!” ANSWER: He is fine!
“He sleeps a lot – you let him sleep too much!” ANSWER: He is a baby!

There was a baby gallery:
At the wedding I was so concerned about him being fussy and disrupting things. But, then I discovered there was a baby gallery. In the back of the wedding venue sat multiple moms with strollers and babies. I am sure these things have always existed at weddings or events but I have never noticed them. So I joined in the fun.

You really do need all that stuff:
I over packed for Renn thinking we will never go through that many clothes or burp clothes, etc… But, we did. I could have used double the amount of burp clothes I brought. Next time!

He grew up:
Eric and I swear that just over the few days we were gone he grew up. He is “talking”, smiling up a storm, sleeping better and more independent. It is true – it all goes really fast.

Deal or No Deal?

2008-06-25T13:51:00.000-07:00

We are leaving today on our first BIG road trip since Renn has arrived. I have spent the last two days packing every time he was napping in an effort to get it all done. Today my task was fill the car with gas and get disposable diapers for the journey. Target was having a great deal on our favorite diapers – plus I had $14.00 worth of coupons I could apply. Woo hoo!
After his 9 a.m. feeding we headed off. He usually loves the car and falls asleep almost instantly. But not today. Instead he SCREAMED all the way to Target. I kept thinking "it is going to stop – I know it will. He will fall asleep any minute now"– but that any minute now never came. We arrived at Target and I loaded his car seat onto the shopping cart and headed in. The crying continued. I finally had to take him out and carry him. Try carrying a crying baby – pushing a shopping cart – and loading boxes of diapers and wipes into your cart. Nothing fun about it. After I checked out I had to fight him to get him back into his car seat which he simply didn’t want to do. Once I had him loaded in and had made a complete scene in Target that I realized my “deal” on diapers had gone from being a deal to a no deal.
When I had gotten out of the car I hooked my brand new sunglasses onto my shirt and I guess when I took Renn out of his car seat to stop the crying I pressed him against my chest which in-turn broke the NEW sunglasses. Bargain on diapers is now a wash! BUM DEAL!
Oh! The woes of parenthood!

Torture

2008-06-23T08:32:00.000-07:00

I had been dreading this day since before he was born. The day of shots! I have heard people speak of how hard it is to watch your baby hurt and the fever they can get as a side effect. I just didn't want to go through it or put Renn through the pain. But, the day came... he is two months old and must get his first set of vaccines.
Eric wasn't going to be able to be there due to work but, like the amazing father he is at the last minute was able to meet us there. We went through a routine exam and I asked my list of questions I have developed over the last two months. All is well and he is a growing boy! He went from 6 lbs to 10 lbs 8 oz! YEAH!!!
Now it was time. He was a fuss bucket prior to the shots so I thought this is going to be miserable. The nurse warned us that they tend to hold their breath and turn bright red. I held his hands and he was sucking on my hand as hard a he could. The first two shots weren't bad. He cried but it was nothing we hadn't heard before. But, the next three shots were torture. He did hold his breath and then screamed like you have never heard before. He cried real tears and then Eric and I began crying real tears. IT WAS AWFUL! Eric held him when it was over while the nurse gave me final instructions and I tried to pull myself together.
He slept in his pack and play beside us the next couple of night. He never got a fever - but his little legs did get sore and he would whimper if you touched him there.
I am already not looking forward to the next round - everyone says "it gets easier!". They better be right.

eight weeks of learning

2008-06-18T13:27:00.000-07:00

I have now known Renn Jackson outside of the womb for 8 full weeks! That is eight weeks of learning...learning about Renn and myself.
What I have learned about Renn:
He changes everyday. There is new hair, his eyelashes get longer, he make a new faces or a new noise. Each day is new and different and we never have one that is identical to another.

When he hurts I hurt. I would love nothing more than to learn the foreign language of "baby" and be able to know exactly what each cry means and how to fix it.

He is looker. He loves to look out and about. Looking at the ceiling fan, looking at the yard, looking at his art cards, looking at our faces. Sometime I don't even see what he is looking at, but his eyes are focused in on something.

He loves to be in his sling. I have a swing, bouncer, play mat and more...none of them satisfy. Renn would rather simply be in the sling. It does place him in the exact position he was in the womb. I guess old habits are hard to break even when you are a baby. (As I type this he is asleep in the sling on me)

He has sweet dreams. I love to watch him sleep because his sleep is so animated. He smiles, winks, giggles and his eyes dance with joy. All I can figure is that he is chatting with Jesus and remembering their days together in heaven.

What I have learned about me:
I love love love love love Renn Jackson Bailey! And would do anything for my little tree frog. THE END!

Father's Day

2008-06-15T11:05:00.000-07:00

I know I know this but it never hurts to learn this lesson again. EXPECTATIONS are useless!
I created a ton of expectations surrounding Father's Day for Eric.

My vision:
Renn and I would bring daddy breakfast in bed. Both of us would be perfectly put together. Me looking oh so glamorous and Renn looking handsome as ever. We would all hang out in bed eating and laughing. We would then present daddy with three wrapped gifts. One being framed prints of Renn's hands and feet. Eric would then get dressed for church - where we would all enjoy service together. After church we eat at Eric's restaurant of choice and then head home for some family nap time. We would spent the evening watching a movie and I would make a light dinner. It would be great!

What REALLY happened:
The 5:30 a.m. alarm clock (Renn's cry) sounded and for the first time since April 23rd I just couldn't do it. Eric had to be the one to get up, feed him, change him and play with him till I could manage to drag myself out of bed. We gave him a homemade card and an unwrapped joke gift. I tried all week to get Renn to cooperate with doing his hand and feet prints to no avail. I then had FIFTEEN minutes to get myself and Renn ready for church. Let's just say I did not look glamorous! Church was good - but I got to sit in service for all of 20 minutes before Renn and I needed to go for a walk. We ate Indian Fry Bread on the church patio for lunch and Eric cruised the car show by his lonesome since I thought it was too hot for Renn to be out. We came home and watched the US Open and Renn did fall asleep on daddy's chest. I managed to make homemade mac n cheese for dinner and then Eric went to work in the garage assembling storage cabinets for all the coupon sense stuff I have accumulated. To be honest I was feeling pretty disappointed in myself and Eric's first Father's Day.

But, there was one very special thing that happened that I could have never planned and never expected and that was simply a look. As we were watching the US Open Renn looked straight at Daddy and with a sparkle in his eye gave Eric the BIGGEST smile. He had given me one the day before - this would be his second smile. I kept screaming "did you see that? did you see that?!"
Eric did see it and it was all he needed to make it a great day!

P.S. - Eric thought Father's Day was just right. And until reading this had no idea that I had plans for it to go differently. He was a happy camper!

Perfect

2008-04-29T10:45:00.000-07:00

"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb."Psalm 139:13

I did not believe. But, it is as "they" say it is... he is perfect. The eyes, ears and nose - they are all perfect. Every hair on his head is in just the right place. Watching his lips puts me into a trance and his adorable chin makes me giggle.

"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." Psalm 139:14

His fingers hold mine so tightly and his toes are an exact mirror of my own. I realize he is only days old, but I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that he smiles and it makes my heart leap with joy.

"My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body." Psalm 139:15

His eyes are a window for me to stare through for hours. His voice is a constant song that inspires me to sing. His sleeping face brings me to a place of utmost peace and calm. His alert times remind me how new and precious each moment of life on earth can be and when his tiny hand touches my skin I realize I have never felt a touch so precious.

"All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be."
Psalm 139:16

I am overwhelmed with a feeling called love... a kind of love I am certain I have never known before. I cover him with kisses in hopes that he knows the love that surrounds and protects him. A love that will only grow stronger as each second, minute, hour and day comes to be.

"How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them." Psalm 139:17

I believe now! Becoming a mother has allowed me a peek-a-boo glimpse into God's soul. And I make a vow as a daughter, wife, mother, woman and child of God, to never look in the mirror again and see ugly, fat, unsuccessful, poor or weak because I am now certain...certain that when God looks at me and at you, at his creation, He only sees wonderful. He only sees beauty. He only sees precious. He only sees...perfect.

* this was written in the wee hours of the morning a few days after his arrival. It was used for Radiant Church Mother's Day enotes.

Mr. Renn Jackson Bailey Arrived!

2008-04-28T17:22:00.000-07:00

Mr. Renn Jackson Bailey arrived 4 weeks early (surprise to all of us!)Wednesday, April 23, 2008 at 11:00 p.m. via c-section.
With the help of many co-workers I made it to the hospital and Eric arrived shortly after (he had to stop thinking the call to go to the hospital was a joke!). All is great! He is a little guy weighing in at 6 pounds 18 inches. We saw the doctor today and he got the thumbs up! Here is a link to SOME pictures that have been taken there are many more to filter through and get posted. http://www.flickr.com/photos/caret001/sets/72157604781544248/
We are doing great and are so in love!

Love to all!
Eric, Carey and RENN!!!!

Sooner rather than later...

2008-04-22T14:01:00.000-07:00

We learned today via ultrasound that he is definitely breech and has no room for movement. That means he is coming via c-section a week earlier than his due date.
I am working on looking for the positives and not being too sad. Any prayers you want to say regarding that I am thankful for.
The last couple of weeks have been rough. I am still plagued with constant contractions - most likely cause he is breech and now I have an EXTREME pain in my low back at certain times in the day. They say it is a sciatic nerve thing since it goes away when I walk around.
Eric and I have been so busy with all the this and thats.... buy this, paint that, do this, get that... the list seems to be coming to an end. Only a few more "details" to get down.
Exciting to think he will be here in 3 WEEKS!
Sorry, I have been off line for awhile. It has all just been a bit overwhelming.
It will all be worth it the day he gets here! :)
P.S. - We learned today that he has lots of hair on his head! YEAH!!!!

Fiesta of Fun!

2008-03-29T15:56:00.000-07:00

The evening shower was a Mexican fiesta that even included a sombrero that Eric and I had to wear. Hanging from the sombrero were all sorts of baby things. I seriously think the hat weighed 30 pounds. Eric’s family and co-workers were present and had a great time eating a FABULOUS Mexican buffet prepared by Debbie and Jan. Thank you to Stacie, Gary, Landon, Bill, and Angie for working so hard all day to make it such a fun night.

Simply Lovely

2008-03-29T10:00:00.000-07:00

The morning shower was fabulous! Ginger and Virginia (pictured above) were so sweet to incorporate all of my favorites foods from quiche, breads, to fruit, yogurt, and granola with the topper being EXTREMELY delicious cup cakes!!!! It was all just amazing. Everyone was incredible to bring Baby Bailey children’s books that we have already filled his shelves with. It will be a joy to read to him and let him know who gave him each precious book. Lots of other fun gifts were received as well.
One of the most special moments was the showing of a video they had made of Eric sharing sweet words about the coming bundle of joy and it included a montage of photos from our wedding and ultrasound pictures. The tears were flowing!!!!
It was all just simply lovely!

An apology to my Mama!

2008-03-26T09:48:00.000-07:00

As a kid...well really as a teen I wasn't very appreciative that my Mama made things for me rather than bought things. I wanted all the "cool" storebought things so that I could be just like everyone else. But, now I have come to realize how very thankful I am. And I realize that her making me things was not my parents way of being "cheap" but rather their way of showing love through time and effort.
I have been helping a friend paint the art work that will go over his bed and I wouldn't have it any other way... Eric painted his bedroom even though we are hiring someone to paint the rest of the upstairs...my current project is creating something I had originally registered for, but later realized that was silly when I could make it just as easy and they will mean so much more (P.S. it doesn't hurt that they cost so much less.) The cost savings to me only means getting to buy more stuff that I couldn't make.
So, Mama and Daddy, from the bottom of my heart I am very sorry for all the times I may have made you feel bad for making me things that came from love in your heart!
LIVE AND LEARN!

Week 32 arrives!

2008-03-25T09:43:00.000-07:00

We had a doctors appointment today. Heartbeat 140. He is still breech...he has 4 more weeks to turn before we would decide if we want the doctor to try turning him. From everything I have read that can be a bit risky so we are still praying he decides to do a flip.
We also interviewed our pediatrician. That went well. A girl at work let me know about her and she is very close by our house. So we are set! Moving right along!!

Shower #2

2008-03-24T09:40:00.000-07:00

Here is the cute invite for the evening shower with family and friends! Thanks Stac!

We made it!

2008-03-23T09:29:00.000-07:00

Baby and I made it through Easter week. It was some long days and a lot of walking... but honestly we came through it better than I expected. All these years working for churches I have watched many a parent have to work long hours Easter weekend, but until this year did I fully comprehend the sacrifice.
Easter at my house as a kid goes down as one of my favorites so realizing all the things that would NOT be happening next year was a bit difficult. As I had to arrive at the stadium at 5:00 a.m. on Sunday I thought about not getting to dress Baby Bailey for his first Easter, or not getting to do a morning scavenger hunt, or being so tried after services that I wouldn't be packing an Easter day picnic...
But, one of the girls I work with has two kids and this year they just did all the stuff they would have done on Sunday on Saturday and she said it worked great! So hopefully that will provide the solution for creating those special memories of Easter celebrations for Baby Boy Bailey. Other people at work just shipped their kids off to their grandparents for the week. At least I know my dad creates an awesome Easter basket scavenger hunt! Any other ideas? Let me know.

The BURN!

2008-03-21T03:34:00.000-07:00

Last night Eric and I went to this new little Mexican place that opened on the corner. It was quite tasty... but I have been up since 12:57 a.m. with the worst heartburn EVER! I had never had heartburn prior to pregnancy!!!! It is now 3:40 a.m.... only several hour before I need to be at work again for a full day and late night of Good Friday services - can everyone say "UG!" with me?
Tums are not something we have in the house so I have reading about "natural" heartburn remedies... I have been eating papaya enzymes and at the moment I am trying hot water, with sugar, and baking soda. And apparently from what I have read lying down isn't helpful to the situation so sleep is not that great of an option right now. What did we do without the Internet?
Since I am up, twiddling my thumbs and quite certain nobody wants me to call them at 3:45 a.m. thought I would say "hi!" this way. Gonna go heat some more water.

Busy Weekend

2008-03-17T08:45:00.000-07:00

We had a busy family weekend.

Friday night some of our friends from church and their precious one year old (Daniel) came over. Eric was sitting on the floor when they arrived and little Daniel greeted him with a huge HUG. Eric thought it was fabulous!

We learned lots of fun things that night: babies think stairs are fun, more food lands on the floor than in their mouth, the last diaper before bed time is a wrestle fest and our pack-n-play actually works as we actually saw Daniel asleep in it. FUN STUFF!

Saturday morning Eric reported to Daddy Bootcamp. This is a class offered by dads for new dads. Eric went with his BFF from Jr. High who is expecting a boy 7 days before us. Eric learned lots of things like that you should always carry extra onesies, bring mommy a gift to the hospital :), signs of postpartum, what to do when a baby cries, buy spring loaded plug covers and much more. We start our classes together in April.

Saturday evening I officiated my first wedding for two people who had worked for me. I attempted wearing heels and made it through most of the night. I laid down during the day hoping to conserve the amount of time I can stand to the actual point of the ceremony. It seemed to have worked as I made it through and didn't have to ask for a chair as we did the service. Although I think adrenaline helped with that as well. Picture of "Pastor" and baby Bailey to the right.

Sunday was church! I am TRYING to take a back-seat on the weekends so that we can start running the weekends without me and see where any holes lie while I am on leave. We have Easter weekend at Cardinals stadium http://www.radiantchurch.com/ next weekend so let's just say life will be out of control busy. Of course I will be "directing" the team via chair and radio rather than lifting boxes of toys and cribs. UG!

Well that is all for now! Look forward to seeing everyone March 29th for baby shower mania!

The count day begins....

2008-03-10T20:07:00.000-07:00

You can officially start counting down the weeks from 10 today. Today begins week THIRTY!
We had a doctor's appointment today. His heart rate was 150 and for the first time she located his heartbeat on my left side. Since the beginning he has always been on the right side... so that was an interesting footnote for us.
I continue to struggle with the early contractions - they really are just a pain. I can't stand, sit, or walk for really any period of time without them being constant. Lying down is definitely the best position for me - but that isn't exactly where I want to be. The situation is not conducive for work, especially with Easter weeks away. I am having to learn the art of delegation and being able to ask for help!
Everything else is great! Blood pressure, weight, ankles, blood work, etc...she says it all looks good.
DID I MENTION HE COMES IN TEN WEEKS?! TEN WEEKS!!!!

Who knew!

2008-03-10T09:56:00.000-07:00

I thought a car seat was one of the SIMPLE things that went along with baby having. But, when ours arrived this week I learned that was a NOT! Who knew? Luckily, I have plenty of people at work I can take it in to and say "show me how this works?!?, please!" Here are a few shots of his. It is not anything fancy as it just needed to go with our red and silver stroller. But, it gets high ratings from Consumer Reports!

1st Baby Shower Invitation!

2008-03-10T06:26:00.000-07:00

This is the invite for the morning shower with my work friends... cute huh? Thank you Virginia and Co.

THIS POST CONTAINS TMI (too much information)

2008-03-03T09:09:00.000-07:00

WARNING: Do not read this post if you DO NOT find bodily function information amusing!!!

On Friday night Eric and I got a pizza in addition to some hot wings and we settled in for a movie. I swear to you that not 2 MINUTES after he began eating his wings he developed gas. By the time the movie was over and it was time to head to bed this "issue" had only gotten worse!!!
Once I was all tucked into bed with my million pillows all around me - Eric had the worst release of fumes possible. It sent me into a gagging fit. Eric, found this hilarious and could not stop laughing. What he didn't realize was that amidst his laughing so hard that my gagging had turned into actually puking in bed. So at this point I am crying and he doesn't even realize it. So I start crying for "HELP!" and he comes to realize this is not funny ANY MORE!!!
He comes over and helps me get cleaned up and we eventually settle back into bed for what I hope is a sound night of rest. Unfortunately, the release of gases never stops in the night. At one point I got up and went down stairs for water - and when I tried to re-enter the bedroom I was literally knocked over by the hideous smell in the air. I made it to the bedroom bathroom where another gagging fit ensued. I got a towel and covered my face - I ducked and covered on the way out of the bedroom and made my way to the guest bedroom where I woke in the morning.
Eric, came in to find me that morning and my opening words were "YOU NEED TO GO FEBREZZE THE BEDROOM RIGHT NOW!"
****I promise I normally would not share this kind of personal information with the public but it is too funny a story to not be recorded in Baby Boy Bailey's journey!

Travel Bed Arrives

2008-03-03T08:55:00.000-07:00

Perhaps the early contractions are making me nervous or I am a sucker for a good deal. But, last week I found the pack-n-play we wanted on Ebay - new and sealed in the box. I won the bid and it arrived on Friday.

I wish someone would have had a video camera to tape Eric and I trying to figure out how to put it together. We would get one side up and locked but not the other - we put a few of the bars in backwards - and almost gave up on how to put the changing pad part on. Eric, had a "I AM BOSS!" talk with the pack-n-play and we finally got it. We learned that practice will make perfect. With Aunt Teagan's wedding a month after he is born it will come in very handy. Now we just need a car big enough to fit all the stuff in. :)

Preview Day

2008-03-03T08:44:00.000-07:00

What is it about ultrasounds and illness? This time it was me! I woke up Friday morning feeling like I was being stabbed with knives in my eyeballs... that is code for headache. I can only guess that it was allergy related as Arizona is in full bloom and I can't take Claritin. So I wasn't in the best of shape for the day - but there was no way I was going to miss this.

Eric and I went to "Peek of You" for our 10 minute viewing session. The girl doing the ultrasound reminded Eric of Janice from Friends - YIKES! Baby Bailey would not get his hands or feet out of his face so it wasn't the clearest of pictures, but it was still pretty cool. He is currently breech - so say a prayer that the little guy flips in the next couple of weeks. We came home and watched the video again - actually we have watched it everyday since and we see something new every time. The funniest part is that several times he sticks his tongue out and licks his hand. It is really cute. A guy at work is going to compress the video for me so that I can post it here so stay tuned.

I have to say when I left I wasn't very certain it was worth the money but, now I would say I would do it again. It has been fun to watch and feel like you get to know him just a little bit more. 11 more weeks to go!!!

Passed the test!

2008-02-29T10:30:00.000-07:00

Baby and I passed the diabetes test! Yeah!

28 week Doc update

2008-02-25T04:40:00.000-07:00

For the first time I felt like I could go to the doctors office with cause for concern. I was scheduled for my gestational diabetes test as well as my 28 week check-up. The diabetes test was gross but not the worst thing invented. I thought the drink tasted like melted orange jello. Keyes would have liked it. I have not heard the results back, but they should come any day.
I let them know about all the contractions I have been having so they did a check and I am not dilated at all - so that is the good news. They tell me to just keep my water intake high (which is at 150 ounces a day) and take it easy. The passenger seat of my car is filled with flats of water that I drink drink and drink coming and going. I truly do have to pee every 2 minutes. Sorry, if that is too graphic!
The contractions haven't subsided at all - in fact now they happen at all hours rather than just starting in the early evening. But, I feel a millions times better knowing I am not dilated. Since Eric and I have been a bit stressed with the extra activity we are treating ourselves to a 3D ultrasound on Friday. We will get a DVD of Baby Boy Bailey (just consider that his first, middle and last name as that is probably what I will call him forever... plus the fact that his monogram would be incredibly balanced!) and some pictures! We are excited. I will make sure to post everything up soon after we get home. It's probably funny to our parents that we can get an ultrasound (a 3D version at that!) as easy as ordering nuggets at Chick-fil-a.

The new list!

2008-02-22T09:06:00.000-07:00

Airplanes, clowns, water, car wrecks, and at times death. That is my list of fears that I struggle with. As my relationship with Christ has grown He and I have been able to work through some of my fears. I guess I should say the truth is that as I have learned that I am truly not “in-charge” of THE WORLD I have come to understand that my fears serve no healthy purpose. But, now my fear is that I have truly never known fear till now. Since learning we were pregnant I have fears that I never knew could exist: Will I miscarry? Is the baby healthy? Am I healthy? Am I eating right? Is there enough amniotic fluid? Is there enough room in there for him? Has he moved 10 times in the hour? Where will the money come from for all the stuff needed? How do we afford childcare and health insurance for the munchkin? Will I have to have a C-section? Will he have jaundice? Will he latch on easily? Will he sleep well? What happens when he gets sick? Will he be a happy baby? The list keeps going and going and going.

The past two days have brought this home for me as Tuesday and Wednesday in the early evening I had three contractions pretty close together. The doctor has told me that if I have four in an hour I am to go to the ER. Thankfully, the fourth has not come… but I feel like I just lay there in that hour trapped in my fears waiting and praying for the fourth to not arrive. Running through my head is zillions of fears about what it means if it does come?

As I walk through this new journey I feel like I am JUST beginning to maybe, possibly, slightly comprehend how God must feel about us as our Heavenly parent. If I can feel all the emotions I feel about Baby Bailey as his earthly parent what in the world does it feel like to be our Creator? His willingness and purpose in sending Jesus as a sacrifice for us is beginning to make a lot more sense to me… God was willing to do ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING to keep us safe and protected. And that I can understand.

Belly Dancing!

2008-02-11T17:35:00.000-07:00

I am not talking about dressing up like some harem girl and shaking my hips although that might be good exercise after the baby comes… what I am talking about is the dancing that is literally going on in my belly. Pregnancy has brought about a few annoyances such as non-stop trips to the bath room, sore hips from sleeping on my side and the desire to eat a lot of Cheerios but one of the daily joys I get from the baby is getting to feel his little body moving and discovering his own limbs. If I start thinking about it too much I get a bit weirded out. I mean there is a baby… a human being living inside of me. A HUMAN BEING LIVING INSIDE ANOTHER HUMAN BEING?! God gets my utmost kudos for creativity. I can definitely say I am glad I am not sitting on an egg on 9 months… can I get an Amen?
The daily movements are like “our special time” and our way of having the most beautiful conversation without words. He gently nudges me in the early morning to say “good morning”, tells me “thank you” after I eat, and says “let’s play” shortly after Eric gets home. SIDE NOTE: What is it about Eric that entices rowdiness? I am starting to realize that while I am not having twins I am about to get TWO baby boys!!! I am already feeling as if I will miss these inside the belly times between us but I am more than certain that his movements in the world will be just as precious. Looking forward to it!

Strolling down “wheeling and dealing” lane!

2008-02-08T15:34:00.000-07:00

Eric and I have been disappointed that the price of the ’07 stroller we had picked out hadn’t seemed to drop even with the ’08 models out. But, this week ebay provided a solution. I found a lady selling a new red (the color we wanted) seat and canopy to our stroller. She originally bought the red version and later decided she wanted blue so the Baby Jogger Company sold her a blue seat and canopy therefore she had this new red one to sell. I talked with Baby Jogger and they will sell you the stroller frame separately for a fraction of the price… I am trying to figure why everyone doesn’t do this. I won the bid for the seat and canopy and with the cost of the frame from Baby Jogger we will get the complete stroller for half the cost we have found it being sold for. WOO HOO! Gotta love a great deal!

Ooooh those cravings!

2008-02-07T15:31:00.000-07:00

I would say one of the most frequent questions I get is “What cravings do you have?”
Honestly, I had preconceived ideas that cravings would be more dramatic than they are. But, I have had a few funny things happen.
One of the first I had was a “craving” for a broccoli and cheese baked potato. In fact one night after work I went out of my way to drive through a Wendy’s where I knew I had ordered a broccoli and cheese baked potato on many a youth trip. But, to my shock I discovered they no longer sold them… I thought fast and convinced the teller to just give me plain potato. I then headed to a Quiznos where I planned on buying a cup of broccoli and cheese soup. Do you see where I am going with this? My plan was almost thwarted due to the people in front of me but, I literally managed to get the bottom of the soup pot! Broccoli and cheese baked potato MISSION COMPLETE!
The other craving I have had, that Eric doesn’t mind, is for Fuddruckers. I have always liked Fuddruckers but it has never been a place I ask to go or feel like I long for… I am very thankful that they sell me their kids’ burger! It is more than enough.
I can also say I am happy to report that I have had no aversion to one of my favorite meals of beans, corn tortillas, and guacamole and only had a slight aversion to chicken!
I would say the only other craving I could list is a frozen Snickers bar. I have my mom to thank for even knowing that exists. Thanks to my handy dandy coupon sense program I was able to buy 8 king size Snickers bars for $2.50. I keep them in the freezer just cut myself off a little piece when the craving takes over!

Week 25 begins!

2008-02-05T03:50:00.000-07:00

Another routine doctors appointement yesterday. She said I am doing "great!" on my weight. WOW! Did she know what I wanted to hear? I measured 25cm so the baby is right on track and his heart rate is still 140. I did have a little contraction while I was in there (does that word scare anyone else like it does me?). He makes a little ball and then it goes away. She said as long as they go away fairly quickly and are not consistent they are nothing to worry about.
I have my fun "check for gestatial diabeates" test in 3 weeks and then she said after that I will move to seeing her every two weeks rather than once a month. Ummmm...when she said that it sort of smacked me in the head that maybe this whole baby having thing is coming sooner rather than later.
Eric and I are all signed up for our birthing classes that start in April and Eric is thinking about taking "Daddy Bootcamp" which the hospital offers. It is taught by real life dads! Who votes he should take it?
The next task to check off my list will be finding a pediatrician...the list never seems to end.

You know you're having a baby when....

2008-01-26T15:42:00.000-07:00

When you publish a picture for all the world to see of you 15 pounds heavier than you were 24 weeks ago. YIKES!!! Here is the updated belly picture that has been in such demand.

Shower mania

2008-01-25T15:39:00.000-07:00

March 29th is THE day! Several of my girlfriends from work will be hosting a shower for me that morning... they know I LOVE breakfast and then Stacie and Co. will be hosting a couples shower for Eric and me that evening. It's a MEXICAN FIESTA... all my favorite foods in one day. :) FUN STUFF! Mark your calendars!

Registry Complete!

2008-01-22T14:56:00.000-07:00

Goodness! I think this was more difficult than doing a wedding registry... but it is complete.
The one with USA baby will be up in 24-48 hours. The "personalization" on some of the pottery barn things aren't the real initials...they are just placeholders for the time being. Eric is still working on the middle name. There are a few items we are not officially registered for since we wanted 2007 styles. They are the stroller and car seat.
http://www.babyride.com/imcc00us35un13bo13.html
http://www.babyride.com/bj-69053.html

Our selections are at:
http://www.potterybarnkids.com/registry/index.cfm?cm_type=gnav
This one has all our bedding selections, stuff for the room, and clothes.
http://www.landofnod.com/gift-registry/default.aspx
This one has some of my favorite things!
http://www.usababyphoenix.com/
This one has the boring stuff :)

Payback is rough!

2008-01-20T18:58:00.000-07:00

When Keyes was born I would torture my mama by waking "the baby" whenever I felt like he had slept too long.
Well, now I am being paid back for all my crimes. Eric likes to ask if the baby is kicking or being quiet. When I respond with "quiet" he then comes over to talk to the baby in the belly. It never fails that within minutes of his conversation with the baby about all the fun we will have once he arrives (which always includes a story about quading in the desert) he WAKES UP! And I don't mean just a little... he begins bang bang banging on my tummy. Eric sits back and laughs as he watches my belly move.
While it is cute for a minute or two what Eric doesn't understand is that he gets to go back to his quite little life while my belly feels like someone is playing drums inside it.
Eric has enjoyed learning about the power of his voice.
I just wish he could quiet the baby as easily as he wakes the baby. :)

dreams are soooooo revealing!

2008-01-15T07:26:00.000-07:00

My dream about the baby last night gave me a laugh. Here is how it went:
My water broke while I was asleep and I didn't wake up. So Eric carried me to the car, drove me to the hospital where I had the baby - all still while sleeping ( I am hoping this means my labor involves little pain). My doctor was my San Antonio family doctor. Everyone finally woke me up and showed me the baby. He was so cute with a full head of hair - he had a little curl on top like Eric. But, he had a rubber band wrapped twice around his nose. I was told he got "stuck" while coming out and this was how they do baby nose casts.
I suddenly realized he hadn't eaten and it had been several hours! As I went to feed him I discovered that he already talked and gave me very clear instructions on how to make the feeding thing work best. He was very helpful!
I then went to sleep again.
So let's see what are the conclusions from this dream: I am worried about sleep, his nose, and breast feeding! Fun stuff!

We agree!

2008-01-14T19:53:00.000-07:00

Eric and I came to an agreement on bedding for the baby's room! We are going to go with Marissa bedding in bright green from Pottery Barn kids! I won't put you through the many conversations we had to have to reach this agreement - but just know I am thankful we finally agree. WOO HOO!
http://www.potterybarnkids.com/products/nb25/index.cfm?pkey=cbdgnbd%7Cb

Baby's first shopping spree!

2008-01-11T20:02:00.000-07:00

I know I know... everyone keeps telling me we shouldn't be buying baby clothes because people will buy them for us. But, Friday we ventured into Old Navy where they were having this huge 75% off already sale prices so we loaded up on fun baby clothes. We got at least 30 outfits for $40.00... it was very fun! This is going to be Eric's baby boy so it is required to be the best dressed boy in existence so I figure the more clothes the better!

All is well!

2008-01-07T20:10:00.000-07:00

We had a doctors appointment today. All is well. Baby's heartbeat is 140 and I measured 21.5. I continue to think something more exciting will happen at these appointments other than them saying "your still pregnant!" Although it is reassuring to know my belly is growing because I am having a baby and not just because I like Blue Bell. They said as long as all continues to go well we won't be having another ultrasound. That makes us a bit sad but obviously we would rather things continue to go well than have another ultrasound.

What are enchilades?

2008-01-02T07:36:00.000-07:00

I grew up in San Antonio, Texas - the capital of Tex-Mex! And I list Mexican as one of my absolute favorite foods. But, the key to this story is that at EVERY Mexican restaurant for my entire life I have ordered a side of beans, a side of guacamole, and an order of corn tortillas. I truly have NEVER had any interest in ordering anything else. But, on January 2nd of 2008 I found myself having a whole new experience.
On this day Eric and I went to a fabulous hole in the wall Mexican restaurant with his brother Bobby in Ocean Beach aka OB and it was there that baby boy Bailey introduced me to a whole new food. As I looked over the menu I couldn't shake the feeling that I wanted a cheese enchilada. WHY? Why would I ever want a cheese enchilada? I have never had one in my life - but there was no way I was going to get away with not ordering this foreign dish.
So there I sat with my enchilada - along with my side of beans, side of guacamole, and order of corn tortillas. At first I just stared at my plate not really sure what to do. I proceeded to take a bite - sauce and all. And to my surprise it wasn't bad. I didn't finish the whole thing (that's what I have Eric for) but I do want to thank baby Bailey for the latest and greatest food adventure.

New Year's Eve in the dark!

2007-12-31T20:23:00.000-07:00

New Year's Eve was spent at Grandpa Bailey's in Poway with Angie, Teagan, and her finance Drew. The Santa Ana winds were going crazy so we were without power and spent most of the evening in candlelight chatting about our '08 goals/resolutions. When we did have power we watched recorded episodes of Law and Order SVU. Eric had never seen this show so we now have one more show added to our weekly must watch list. Definately wasn't a crazy and wild New Year's Eve, but I guess we are preparing for the many New Year's ahead.

Things, things, and more things

2007-12-27T20:42:00.000-07:00

Today we went shopping at USA Baby with Mama Bonnie and found the baby's crib, dresser, hutch, and stroller. Eric was very thorough in his stroller research and literally drove all the strollers around the store and jogged with the joggers. After the sales lady showed us the folding feature on the City Series Baby Jogger we were sold on that one. DONE!
http://babyjogger.com/cityseriesmain.htm

Here is a picture of the crib:
http://www.apindustries.com/en/item-martha-crib-28.html?collection=11
It turns into a full size bed so the way I look at it he is set till he is at least 20!

Christmas Day

2007-12-25T21:01:00.000-07:00

Christmas morning was very laid back. It was spent with Bonnie Mama and uncle Keyes opening stockings. Then Grandma Graca, Jan, Aunt Stacie, and cousin Landon came over for a yummy brunch. We already can't wait for baby's first Christmas next year.

The Big Reveal!

2007-12-24T21:07:00.000-07:00

Christmas Eve I worked the majority of the day at church and anxiously awaited the evening festivities where we were going to reveal to family if you were a boy or a girl.
Each family (Stacie and Landon, Shawn, Jen, Ashley, Cameron and Addison, Bonnie Mama and Keyes, Grandma Grace and Jan) was given a package. As they unwrapped it they discovered a baby bottle filled with Hershey's Hugs and Kisses with a note attached that said "Hugs and Kisses! Love, Eric, Carey, and baby BOY Bailey"
Everyone was thrilled to hear the news and cousin Cameron declared that he would have another "little buddy!"

Daddy could tell REAL quick!

2007-12-18T10:06:00.000-07:00

We were anxiously awaiting this day. The day when we would find out if you were a boy or a girl. (Although, I have said from the beginning you were a boy!) We woke up nice and early since our appointment was at 8:15 a.m. and it takes us about 45 minutes to get there even driving in the rush hour carpool lane. Eric dropped me at the door of the office building and was going to drive around to look for a parking space. I made my way up to the office, signed in, and went to sit down and take out my journal so I could record my thoughts. But, the second I got the pen out and it hit the paper the office door opened and they called "Carroll". I started to panic a bit - I wasn't ready. I hadn't recorded my prayer, my thoughts, and most important Eric wasn't there. I told them that my husband was parking the car and would be in soon. But, that didn't seem to slow them down - they were getting me up on the table. YIKES! I was seconds away from covering my belly and saying "NO! You can't start, yet!" when Eric came whisking in. The nurse was saved from a black eye!
Now the thing that was kinda yucky was that Eric was sick. And his doctor even told him we couldn't get very close to each other till he was better. So there we were about to see our baby for the 2nd time and we can't even hold hands or hug.
The nurse began with the gel and magic wand thing. Eric saw within seconds that the baby was a BOY! I totally missed it because I had no idea what I was looking for. This appointment involved measuring every bone and body part. So it felt like a big science experiment. I think the most interesting part to me was watching the beating heart. They even did a 3-d image of the heart and then sliced through the image... it was fascinating. Finally, she made her way back down to the "parts" region and I could see that the baby was fore sure a boy.
The nurse said he weighed 10 ounces and that all looked good. It was fun to see him again. Eric and I had a fun drive home chatting about baby boy bailey and of course we made sure to keep our distance. :)

Week 18 arrives

2007-12-17T10:28:00.000-07:00

We had a basic baby doctors appointment today. Nothing new to report. Heartbeat still at 140. She did tell me I can't sleep flat on my back, but need to be propped up. Hmmm... I have a feeling that will prove difficult.